celeryandhummus:

our kids will probably attend a middle school dance where the theme is the 2010’s

they’ll wear leggings with ugg boots and twerk to “call me maybe”

forever-classyx:

Oh my gosh people, be nice to your waiter/waitress, it’s not their fault that your food is cold or if it’s under cooked.  Be nice to the cashiers who are still training and can’t ring up your items as quickly as you want.  If a stranger smiles and says hello to you, smile and say hello back!  It’s just common courtesy, I don’t understand why people have to be so rude.

charlamagnethagod:

The two hardest things in the world are trying not to eat out of boredom and not taking 6 hour naps after school

twiistz:

i met a girl with 12 nipples
sounds funny
dozen tit